FLY WITH ME
This story is still a WIP, so critique away. It’s set partly in Melbourne, Australia, and in New Zealand.
Thanks … and enjoy 🙂
“Who?” Tiffany asked hardly above a whisper. Her whole body shook, and she knew she had to sit down soon or she’d faint.
“Thomas Terrill.” Jones repeated. “He was up on charges last year for the possession of drugs. The file states that you were involved—”
“There’s no way, I come with you.” She nearly screamed, panic rising within her. “You can’t make me—”
“Miss Brooks. We’re not here to take you with us, but to ask you a few questions,” Sergeant Harris explained. “Is there anybody with you at home?”
Tiffany’s forehead creased into a frown as she shook her head. Anxiety spread through the pit of her stomach, and she had to resist the urge to step back to shut the door.
Thanks for all your comments,
I do appreciate each single one of them!
And check out Snippet Sunday Facebook site for other writers.
AMAZON UK: http://amzn.to/29FTb4B
AMAZON AU: http://amzn.to/2a9yKgW
I love that last line. Love her mild hysteria, too. Whatever does she know about Thomas that would cause such a reaction?
Thank you, Aldrea. Glad you like it. 🙂
She is very shaky. I wonder why?
We’ll find out soon. Thanks for stopping by, Aurora.
Faced with a situation like hers, I’d be tempted to flee too. Great snippet.
LOL … I’d be, too 🙂 Thanks Joyce
Wow, she’s really having an anxiety attack over this – very effective snippet!
Thanks, Veronica.
I like the way you describe her panic. Great show of emotion. Something seems to be missing between Jones’ comment “The file states you were involved–” and her response. If she wasn’t involved with Terril, she should deny it. If she was, she would probably say something like “Oh, my God.” Or “D-Drugs?” Good luck!
Thanks, Diane. I will re-work the paragraph with the above suggestion in mind. Really appreciate it.
You can feel her fear. I love how he’s trying to calm and reassure her that she’s not in trouble.
I think you might have missed a word here, though? I come with you.
Oh … I’d better check that out. Thanks for the heads up, PT, I appreciate it.
I’m curious to know more. Was she involved? She seems scared so she must know something.
Thanks, Karen. Glad you liked it!
You’ve done a great job of depicting her mood of near panic. I have no idea if she was involved, or involved in what, but I want to read on.
So happy you liked it, Ed. Thank you.
Wow, great display of panic! Now I want to know if she has something to hide…
Thank you, Elizabeth… and we’ll find out soon
I imagine her involvement with the drug charges were very traumatic
I suppose any dealings with the police can go either way. Thanks for stopping by, Chelle.
Woooow. Talk about tense and fearful. You do a great job of portraying her emotions. I wonder what happened to make her this scared and edgy.
Thank you so much, Daelyn. Really appreciate your comment!
She seems to be really scared of Thomas Terrill I wonder what their relationship is.
We’ll find out soon, Linda. Thanks for stopping by.
People in authority scare me, I’d shut the door too!
LOL …. they’re not all that bad 🙂 thanks for stopping by, Cecilia.